[Onefast99gsx]

People around my area know how much I hate the current heat streak we're having here. Thought i would share this with you.



Just moved to Arizona! Now this is a state that knows how to live!!

Beautiful sunny days and warm balmy evenings. What a place! It is

beautiful. I've finally found my home. I love it here.



June 14th:



Really heating up. Got to 100 today. Not a problem. Live in an

air-conditioned home, drive an air-conditioned car. What a pleasure

to see the sun everyday like this. I'm turning into a sun worshipper.



June 30th:



Had the backyard landscaped with western plants today. Lots of cactus

and rocks. What a breeze to maintain. No more mowing the lawn for

me. Another scorcher today, but I love it here.



July 10th:



The temperature hasn't been below 100 all week. How do people get

used to this kind of heat? At least, it's kind of breezy, though.

But getting used to the heat is taking longer than I expected.



July 15th:



Fell asleep by the community pool - got 3rd degree burns over 60% of

my body. Missed 3 days of work. What a dumb thing to do. I learned

my lesson though. Got to respect the ol' sun in a climate like this.



July 20th:



I missed Lomita (my cat) sneaking into the car when I left this

morning. By the time I got to the hot car at noon, Lomita had died

and swollen up to the size of a shopping bag, then popped like a water

balloon. The car now smells like Kibbles and *****. I learned my

lesson though. No more pets in this heat. Good ol' Mr. Sun strikes

again.



July 25th:



The wind sucks. It feels like a giant freaking blow dryer!! And it's

hot as hell. The home air-conditioner is on the fritz and the AC

repairman charged $200 just to drive by and tell me he needed to order

parts.



July 30th:



Been sleeping outside on the patio for 3 nights now, $225,000 house

and I can't even go inside. Lomita is the lucky one. Why did I ever

come here?



Aug. 4th:



It's 115 degrees. Finally got the air-conditioner fixed today. It

cost $500 and only gets the temperature down to 85. I hate this

stupid state.



Aug. 8th:



If another wise *** cracks, 'Hot enough for you today?' I'm going to

strangle him. Damned heat. By the time I get to work, the radiator

is boiling over, my clothes are soaking wet, and I smell like baked

cat!!



Aug. 9th:



Tried to run some errands after work. Wore shorts, and when I sat on

the seats in the car, I thought my *** was on fire. My skin melted to

the seat. I lost 2 layers of flesh and all the hair on the back of my

legs and *** ... Now my car smells like burnt hair, fried ***, AND

baked cat.



Aug 10th:



The weather report might as well be a damn recording. Hot and sunny.

Hot and sunny. Hot and sunny. It's been too hot to do **** for 2

damned months and the weatherman says it might really warm up next

week. Doesn't it ever rain in this damn desert? Water rationing will

be next, so my $1,700 worth of cactus will just dry up and blow over.

Even the cactus can't live in this damn heat.



Aug. 14th:



Welcome to HELL! Temperature got to 115 today. Cactus are dead.

Forgot to crack the window and blew the damn windshield out of the

car. The installer came to fix it and said, "Hot enough for you

today?" My sister had to spend $1,500 to bail me out of jail. Bet

that glass man will never ask THAT question, again !!! Will write

later to let you know how my trial goes.

Freaking Arizona!!! What kind of a sick demented idiot would want to

live here in the summertime??? Now I know why all those old folks head

back up north every May!!!